Top Tips for Handling Violent Situations: It can be tough to know how to react in a violent situation since things can escalate quickly, requiring immediate choices. To help you navigate this rare occurrence, we’ve created a list of recommendations. Remember, your safety is the top priority. Material items can be replaced, but you are irreplaceable.

Here are some key reminders for handling a violent situation:

1. Take care with your words

Try to avoid saying, “Calm down.” Consider how you would feel if you were in a distressed state. Keep in mind that your emotions can influence your words, and if you’re feeling anxious, that will come through in your speech. Pay attention to your tone and volume; if you come across as overly formal, confrontational, or commanding, it may lead to increased tension. Speaking in a calm and measured way can often encourage the other person to respond similarly.

2. Acknowledge the problem

It’s important to address the obvious issue at hand, so go ahead and bring it up. Recognize the feelings involved and try to ask open-ended questions to gain clarity. For example, you might say, “I can see you’re feeling upset; how can I assist you?” or “You seem really angry; what’s happening?” Just a heads up: if you ask someone if they’re upset when it’s obvious they are, it might hurt your credibility and lead to a negative reaction.

3. Be a great listener

Keep a comfortable distance while using your body language and gestures to convey that you’re ready to listen. Face the person, open your arms, lift your eyebrows, and maintain respectful eye contact. Encourage them to share their thoughts, and remind yourself that the focus is on them. Offer small verbal cues to show you’re engaged, like “sure,” “okay,” or “yes.” Try to hold back from interrupting and save your next question for later.

4. Be empathetic

Focusing on their emotions at the outset is a powerful way to diffuse the situation. Approach them with empathy and ask non-judgmental questions to uncover their feelings. Communicate your intention to understand their perspective. Use open-ended questions to gain clarity about their situation. For instance, you might say, “I’d really like to hear more about what you’re feeling.” If possible, include their name and assure them that “we” will resolve this together.

5. Use silence

In everyday conversations, silence can feel uncomfortable, but it can be quite beneficial during heated discussions. Embracing silence allows you to pause, gather your thoughts, and regain your calm, giving you a moment to reflect. You can initiate a pause by taking responsibility, saying something like, “That’s a significant point; let me take a moment to consider it.” Or, “We’ve discussed a lot; I need a little time to organize my thoughts on everything we’ve covered.”